Stepped away to look at a few things

So I haven't typed any new posts lately cause we have been trying to figure out a lot of things!!! There is soooo much to consider age groups, mental, physical behaviors. We don't have any kids and we have only had our nieces and nephews stay with us a night or two , but this is a day to day thing. I tell someone what we are doing and they chime in their answer "oh you want someone young, cause teenagers have too many problems" ( I know i have said this before) In our classes those seem to be the ones that need the most love.
Our class on Valentine's Day was on Impacts of abuse on development. There was a video of this man telling his story that he lived in an alchoholic family and was never taught anything. He didn't graduate and before he turned 18 he had been arrested 24 times. The police officer told him that will be the last time you will be tried as a juvenile next time an adult. Well that was the first person he said cared enough to tell him something. So he started working at a fancy furniture store delivering and setting it up. He was taught culture and enjoyed it. One delivery he made was to a surgeon who he had him set up his furniture and told him to come by again. Well the boy did and would almost every weekend. The surgeon and him would watch football , eat, talk, etc. He said one time the surgeon took a nap and he was ok with him staying and watching the ame on tv. So the surgeon asked him why haven't you finished High School? He didn't really give a good enough answer so the surgeon said just do it!!! So he did he got his diploma, went on to college, went onto medical school. While doing surgeon rotations the boy now a man got this big adrenilane rush doing surgery and now he is a top thorassic SP? surgeon. His adrenilane rush that he had stealing cars breaking in was all put into surgery!!! All because one man gave him the respect and trust that he needed to move on.
So does this mean we are going to take in a teenager? I don't know.
Although it has been put off for a little longer than I had hoped, but in one of our classes they told us if we have a vacation coming wait till after that to foster. So that is in August , but I still want to DO SOMETHING. So we might do respite care till we get back from our trip. Respite care are people who take in foster kids for a period of time, not long though. While the foster parents go out of town. Some parents wont allow their child to go on vacation with their foster families so they send them to a temporary home while they leave. That way we can have a feel of how this all works!!! Take in some teenagers and all agesthen we can decide what we can handle!!!

Adoption

So our class last Thursday was on adoption. We watched this video of this older man who was raised in the foster system and was never adopted and his little brother got adopted. This man went to grad school started a foundation and did amazing things in his life. All he wanted was to have a family to share it with and someone to be proud of him. WOW!!!!! About every other time I tell someone we are going to foster to adopt people ask how old are we going to go up to? Well honestly we really haven't decided, but someone always chimes in and says you don't want a childthis age or older cause of all the baggage they would bring with them!!! Well Look at this man yes he may have brought drama to someofthe families he was with, but all he wanted was LOVE. That just kills me!!! How can you turn your back on any child?!
For those of you who read this and don't know me I am adopted. I was born in Sacramento, CA and then I went to live with foster parents for about 2 months cause my birth dad would not claim Iwas his child. Finally after 2 months he religuished his rights soI can be adopted. I was raised by 2 WONDREFUL PARENTS!!!!! Yes we had our DIFFICULTIES!!! Who doesn't?
In our class a question was asked who has a harder time adjusting to their new families? A baby or a foster child? I blurted out a foster child cause they know what hashappenedin their life and itprobably was bad. Well the correct answer is a baby!! I was like HUH?! Then she explained afoster child knows what has happened in their past and knows that they can't be with their parents, they know who they look like they have pictures of their families. A baby doesn't know where they come from! That blew me away!! It finally hit me why I have had such a hard time trying to find out who I was and get my bearings. I still wonder what it would be like to seesomeone who looks like me!! I will always wonder. I have a whole in my life that will be filled , but probably not in this lifetime.
My mom always tells me when they got me it was an adjustment for me. My mom says she really believes that hearing my birht mothers voice for 9 months and then going to my foster parents and THEN finally to my parents. That I didn't coo or laugh or smile for the longest time. Cause I was being taken from one familiar place to another. During the class the teacher told us that their is a study that babies have a have a harder time adjusting then kids do. That if they held a baby and said I know it's tough and I know your scared and I know you are wondering where you are at while rocking them they adjust faster. Then saying Ther there it's gonna be ok don't worry you are ok, while rocking them.
WHO KNEW?!